I’m addicted to social media.
I never would have believed that I could become addicted to social media. Often, I told myself that I used social media as a tool and as a means to stay connected with people. The truth is that I’m addicted. My addiction manifested itself in several forms and the truth is that it controlled my life.
The first thing I would do every morning after hitting snooze several times would be to check the various platforms that I was apart of. If I happened to wake up in the middle of the night whether it was bladder related or from one of my kids crying I would then proceed to spend thirty minutes to an hour scrolling through my various feeds.
As a result, I would often be sleep deprived which would then lead to crankiness and the inability to wake up early. (This is a practice that I started last April where I gave myself the goal of waking up at 4:30 every morning.) When I finally would wake up I wouldn’t even greet my wife with a “Good Morning!” I would greet my various mistresses instead.
Here’s another confession…
Social media would often distract me from having my morning devotional time. This devotional time was supposed to be where I tried to meditate on God by studying the Bible. Most people might not think that to be a big deal but as a pastor it was very hypocritical. I would often talk about how necessary it is to spend time with God but yet a lot of the time I was distracted during my time with God. Sadly, I would even short-change my time with God or not have it at all.
Not only that. I would half-bake all my relationships in order to be “connected”. Disconnecting from friendships but even my most valued relationships with my wife and daughters. So often I would skip out on time with them whether it was play or being in the moment. Instead I would find myself looking for the next “LIKE”. While my wife and girls were giving me three DISLIKES!
One month later.
I find myself being much more focused. Much more intentional. Much more calm and at peace. Most days, by mid morning I would accomplish the following:
Spent time with God
Spent time with my wife
Spent time with my girls
Led my girls through their devotional time
Made my girls breakfast
Made all the beds
Washed all the dishes and put them away Thrown out the trash
Done all the laundry and put it away
Done my emails
Done my office type work
Accomplished all my calls/text messages
This meant that by 10am most morning I was taking my girls to the park so that we could play together. On a really productive day a month ago I would have accomplished a third of that list by the end of the day. This also means that I wouldn’t have taken my girls to the park to play with them. Instead, I would be sitting on the couch scrolling through various apps while my girls entertained themselves with their toys.
So, now… It’s December 1st and I’m not sure that I want to go back on social media. I am going to reestablish my connections but I’m afraid that its going to suck me back in. I’m afraid I’m going to become the old me. The unmotivated, unengaged and distracted me.
I thought about that a lot during this experiment so I decided that I won’t download my social media apps again. Any social media time that I take in will be scheduled and enjoyed after my work is done. It will also be done on my computer exclusively. My phone would make it too easy for me to stay connected all day.
So, as I upload this blog. I’m going to check out my various platforms and see what if anything I have missed. Here goes….